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Archives for November 2016

My personal feelings on the election result

Hey guys. It’s me. I need to just say a few things to my friends out there about the election. Some of you voted for Trump. Some of you voted for Clinton. There’s a lot of reasons for both. I GET IT.

I just want to share with you, and maybe commiserate with some of my soul sisters out there, on how the election results have felt so personal these last few days.

You’ve seen a lot of people talk about grieving the results. The mourning and sadness that those of us who campaigned for a Hillary win feel. The ones of us who were so ready for our country’s first female president, that it almost hurt, we wanted it THAT BADLY. We choked up at the prospect of our daughter’s daughters feeling our pride. Of the generations of women before us that worked to be heard, we wanted to salute their efforts and achievements.

So let’s go back a few years. Like a hundred years. Women couldn’t own property. We couldn’t have a job without our husband’s permission. In some states marital rape was finally outlawed in 2013. What? 2013. Shake my head. We, along with other marginalized groups in this country, can be treated like 2nd  class citizens. We pay the same taxes, but we don’t get the same wage. We point this out, and we’re brushed off that it’s some left fringe conspiracy theory.

I think my husband learned it’s no conspiracy theory when we bought Halloween costumes together this year. Mine cost more and we were practically the same thing.

The likes of Alice Paul and Elizabeth Cady Stanton literally were beaten and some of them, literally died for the right for women to vote. When I fill in my ballot, I am forever grateful the suffering these women chose to endure for me. For my daughter. Thank you Alice.

Face it. The Constitution was written by a bunch of white guys in wigs that divvied up rights as how they saw fit. Eventually black men got more rights. Years later, women got more rights. Yet it still isn’t all fair and equal in the spirit of the land, despite what the letter of the land shows.

I need you to understand this. And here’s why. And pardon me if you’ve never been a victim of sexual harassment, assault or discrimination. If you can’t empathize with me here, then please try to at least sympathize.

The case of Brock Turner unleashed a whole lot of trigger feelings for a LOT of women and men. The number of sexual assaults on campuses in the US is one in four. When a high profile rape case has the perpetrator only serve 3 months of a 6 month sentence- I have mayonnaise in my refrigerator that has sat there longer than Brock Turner sat in prison- women everywhere are ANGRY. Do you blame us? MARTHA STEWART SPENT MORE TIME IN JAIL THAN BROCK TURNER.

Why? Why in God’s name is this possible?

If in 2012, 26,000 women AND men were assaulted in the US military, of which, only a fifth went reported, and 65% of those who reported it, received retaliation. Imagine the horror when your Commander in Chief- elect believes that ‘assault wouldn’t happen if men and women just didn’t serve together’.

The presidential campaign was fraught with quotes of Trump talking about women’s tits and pussies. A news anchor was fired for giggling along with him and yet the candidate can keep yelling things like ‘Lock Her Up’, when he has pending sexual assault charges against him. His sons think if a woman experiences sexual harassment at work they she should just change jobs. Trump’s campaign manager blames rape on the woman being the weaker sex. The candidate that said a woman needs to be punished for seeking an abortion and picked the running mate that believes condomns are too modern is now at the helm of our three branches of government.

Here’s an example of the patriarchy- more money is spent by Pharma companies on advertising Cialis, than researching Pediatric Cancer. Birth control is still considered ‘recreation’ by some insurance companies and legislators, never mind that it’s actual health care.

I’m sorry if it’s been so annoying watching the Hillary supporters cry and get upset over the election results. But it’s because when we fight and try, when we scream and shout, when we demand to be heard, to feel mattered, we were silenced once again. We thought this would be our time. Our chance to feel the sweet satisfaction of speaking out to show that yes, in fact, we’re here. We’ve arrived. We can run the free world. A black man can be president, and now a woman can too. We’ve put in the work these last few hundred years. IT’S OUR TURN!

And then, nope. A big NOPE. No confetti, or balloons. Glass ceiling- still upright.

The Trump win to a lot of women, was like a violation. It was the boss telling you that you didn’t get the job. The judge giving parole to your attacker. That if you had just been more ‘likeable’ to lead the project, you would have been promoted despite the fact that you have twice the years of experience and job training. It was the narrative we’re used to: to not wear the short skirt to the frat party, to not be so bossy when talking to your colleagues, to just hang in there- there’s always next time. As if our team lost the Superbowl. This wasn’t a sport people. This is life. This for some, was the frayed fabric of a victim’s existence to feel justice.

But feminism is a bad word. It’s angry women yelling in marches while burning bras. It’s considered a hateful position to take because it means you hate men.

Uh, no. It means we want the same things. Not more. Not less. Feminism is the radical notion that women are people

I’m sitting here writing this and I know I’ve only scratched the surface. But I hope you get the idea.

We’re used to cleaning up after people’s messes. We’re used to doing double the work for half the pay. Think of where you’d be without the backs of women to carry those burdens. We will prevail. You thought we were angry before. Just wait.

I’ve got a hammer ready.

 

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