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Have you been naughty or nice?

Let’s ask Damien the Christmas Monkey.

Yes, he’s part bendable, lovable primate. Part crazed mitten footed chimpanzee with a tail.

We don’t have Elf on a Shelf at our house. Lots of our friends do. I haven’t even read the story. I’m guessing the Elf sits on shelves around your house and ‘watches’ over your children to report to the North Pole if they have been good. Am I close?

Well, Damien the Christmas Monkey sits in places in our house, and just freaks the crap out of people. When the children say, “mom, would you move that monkey please, he’s scaring me.” I say, “good, because if you’re good, he’ll go away.”

I even use it on my husband. Damien likes to sit on the arm of the couch while he watches TV, or works on his Fantasy Football roster. It’s effective. Oh, and why the name Damien you ask? Because he looks a little evil. Like that boy in the movie, The Omen.

Amazon hasn’t contacted me yet. Or Barnes & Noble. But I’ll let you know when they do. It will be major.

Oh yeah, Take that Shelf Elf. This monkey brought a banana.

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