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I fucking hate cancer.

Don’t get all uppity on me because I swore. I’m really pissed. Dear God I’m so grateful I haven’t had cancer. I do what I can to live healthy and hopefully prevent it. But I know so many, too many who have fought and won, and fought and lost this goddamn battle. Whether it’s my parents, relatives, friends, friend’s children….ugh! STOP!

I wasn’t going to run in the Race for the Cure this year. My hips bother me lately when I run. But screw it. Now I am. I was thinking of hanging up my running shoes and just sticking to making donations. But darn it, life has a different plan. I’ve run 3 Race for the Cures. I have done the Susan G Komen 3 day as well. I’m tired of breast cancer. But I’m not too tired to fight. There’s so many who are fighting for their lives. So the least I can do is run dammit!

I was heading out for some errands while the kids were in school. The weather had been tempting me with some sunshine and I was dreaming of a pair of wedge, cork, sandals. I pictured them in my post this week (Welcome to the party…). They were on sale and I figured, with our tight budget, the least I can afford is a $40 pair of adorable spring sandals to get me in the mood for some warmer weather.

But then the call came from my friend. I hate those calls. Those texts. Those emails. They have that fucking ‘c’ word in them. And by ‘c’ word, I don’t mean ‘C U Next Tuesday’. THAT word is pretty harmless when you think of what the ‘c’ word is that I’M talking about. I’ve had one too many of those types of messages either by phone or computer that say someone has cancer.

So I went out to the store on my errands and got to thinking. I really don’t need those sandals. I want those sandals, but I don’t need them. What I DO need is a new pair of running shoes since the ones I own are 2 years old and have seen 100s of miles already. Not good for the pronating and plantar fasciitis feet of mine.

So I found -whattdya know, a $40 pair of Nikes at Nordstrom Rack. Hey, they have orange in them kinda like the sandals I wanted.

I resent those shoes. Not because ‘it was them or the sandals’ due to budget. But why I had to buy them. I will run the Race for the Cure. But I’m so pissed I need to.

These are them.

I’ve dedicated my races to Julie, Shannon, Jessica, My Aunt Gudrun, and now M. She’s very private, and I don’t know yet of our friends who actually know. I don’t even know if she reads my blog.

So I will fire up my iPod and make new playlists.

This one is always on there:

The reason for this race is the fundraising. If you feel compelled to give- click here and donate to my team- thanks! Race for the Cure Fundraising.

Comments

  1. Great post..and good for you for doing that. Lost my dad to cancer, long time ago now, and just my mom this past January. It is a cruel, insidious, and awful disease that should just go away. I fucking hate it too. My best to your friends health!
    PKC

    • I am really sorry to hear about your parents. Both mine are survivors, but my mom fights it everyday with medication. It will just be part of her from now on. I hate it. Hate it. More than I hate Douche Gingrich. Which is saying a lot!

  2. Andrea says:

    I’m sorry for your friend. I am so blessed to only have had one person close to us get diagnosed and she beat it. I actually live in fear everyday of those texts or calls. Just waiting for the other shoe to drop. Great post and great new shoes, even though the reason for buying them sucks ass. Hugs!

  3. Jenn says:

    I’m so sorry to hear another loved one has been effected by this asshole disease. I hate it too. Both breast cancer and leukemia have hit entirely too many people in our family and circle of friends. You put those shoes to good use…I know you will. Good luck, lady…work on kicking cancer’s ass.

  4. magsx2 says:

    Hi,
    I love the video, I have never heard that before, she has a very strong voice, and the words are very touching.
    I have lost 1 friend to cancer and another one fighting this terrible disease. I wish you the very best of luck with your run, and I love the shoes.

  5. F, as above, the same goes for me. enjoy the run knowing you are making a statement. continue…

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