Once upon a time I was able to jump on a trampoline and keep my bladder from completely giving up.
And once upon a time I was able to sneeze freely without clenching into a vice grip kegel. Ahem.
But once upon a time my boobs didn’t droop past my belly button. Okay, enough with the ‘once upon a time’, this isn’t a fairy tale. Instead, it’s a public service announcement of sorts to inform you of SAM. Super Absorbent Material.
SAM is a new product within the Poise brand of Microliners.
Like a thin undetectable panty liner, this will catch the leaks that tinkle, I mean trickle, when you laugh or sneeze.
1 in 3 women experience LBL (light bladder leakage) and I’m guessing that 99% of those women have had children! It doesn’t matter if you are young or old, it can happen to any of us.
What you don’t want is it to happen when you’re wearing the wrong outfit, or if you are sitting on your neighbor’s couch. Say what?
It happened to me once at a party. And it wasn’t a couch, but a chair to be honest with you. I laughed so hard I peed my pants. Well, I leaked on my pants. I was so afraid that I might have seeped through my pants and onto the seat! I didn’t move for hours. Well, maybe an hour. It was miserable, embarrassing and downright tragic.
I was thinking,’does this happen to everyone?’ Well, it happens to 33.3% of us! But I bet it happens more and those statistics are skewed because there are women out there not revealing their LBL!
Okay. As if you need ANOTHER testimony from me as to why I could use the SAM from Poise, here is a short tale of female super powers if I ever had them.
The other day I was driving. And I sneezed. And I almost peed my pants. But I was able to flex in to a kegel. (Look it up if you don’t know what a kegel is. And if you don’t, where have you been hiding?) Do you realize what the potential dangers are of all these events WHILE DRIVING that I just described?
Handling three simultaneous acts of heroism is hard. And I couldn’t prevent the sneeze, nor could I really prevent the fact that I was about to pee my pants. But had I been wearing a Poise Microliner, I wouldn’t have had to worry about the kegel.
And last but not least- the trampoline. If you have every been to one of those trampoline birthday party places with your kids, you know what I’m talking about.
You really want to jump. I MEAN, come on! It looks like so much fun. There’s that really uber fit mom over there in her Lulu Lemon running capris and she looks like she is having fun. So you go for it. Hey, what’s some jumping on the trampoline when you’re 41?
WHOA! What just happened? Does gravity really do that where you bladder hits your knees and you need to tuck and roll to prevent serious puddling beneath you?
ZOMG! Need I say more?
Listen, if any of this sounds at all familiar, then go get yourself the free sample here, of Poise Micro liners with the SAM!
You don’t have to tell anyone you did. OR, you can be a dear and tell all your friends. Go on, YOU get a free Micro liner, and YOU get a free Micro liner, And YOU….
Okay, you get the idea.
And just so you know, Poise paid me to talk about peeing my pants. They’re special that way.