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What I learned at MamaCon

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Vagillion – n. a million vaginas or in reference to a lot of women. (source- Urban Dictionary)

Vagillion– the word I said by accident, when introducing Nikki of Moms Who Drink and Swear at the comedy show- Honey I Shrunk My Libido.

A brilliant mistake. Like Edison and the light bulb, Ben Franklin and his kite, I coined a phrase I didn’t even know existed. So now I give you a vagillion reasons to attend MamaCon 2014. Okay, I’ll make a short list of a few reasons and we’ll call it good, ‘kay?

(This list is not in numerical order, as you can see.)

85. Do not feel guilty for taking time for yourself
This is important. We are horrible at constantly flexing the guilt muscle. You are thinking of all the things you could or should be doing, and sitting in a seminar with a bunch of moms learning about how to take time for yourself, doesn’t seem like one of those things. Well, let me tell you- it is.

You have to fill your tank to be able to give to others. <pshhsk> (that’s the sound of the loud speaker) “This is your Captain speaking- Mom’s, put your oxygen masks on first.”

Got it? Good.

33. Don’t do chores begrudgingly.
This is hard, I know. Maybe harder than taking time for yourself and not feeling guilty. But I learned that if I want my kids to do chores, I better do my own chores without complaining. Being productive is good. Sure laundry and dishes may not be that fun, but darn it, it’s not hard and it needs to get done. So yeah, I will only complain about chores on Facebook and my blog, not in front of my children. Oh, and I told McSweetie this too. He agrees that rolling his eyes whenever I ask him to take out the trash or put his washed shorts away, is probably not a good example in front of the kids.

122. Hook the shit out of closets.
I know you’re thinking, ‘what in thee sam hill is she talking about?’ Well, it was an organizing expert that shared a nice tidbit about using vertical spaces. We need to do it more. Horizontal, we have nailed. Covered, quite literally. But vertical- there’s a whole new world of storage if we put hooks all over our closets, the backs of doors and under shelves. I will be making a trip to Home Depot soon. Translation- I will be sending McSweetie to Home Depot soon.

22. I need to not worry about the mythical relationship between food and exercise. There is no relationship between food and exercise. They don’t know each other. They’ve never met. There’s a relationship I have with both of them and it’s called, I need them to live. Yeah. It’s that simple. I need to stop thinking over every little calorie, stop beating myself up for every missed trip to the gym. I will eat, I will exercise. I have to. It’s how humans survive. I will eat when I’m hungry, and try to move as much as possible. And this includes trips to the gym, walking the dog, playing catch or pogo-sticking with Owen, or a roll in the sack with hubs. So there.

5. I can host a comedy show like nobody’s business. I’m no Tina Fey or Ellen DeGeneres, but when I impersonated urinating like a sprinkler and read my Sky Rockets in Flight  blog for the crowd, there was much laughter. And I can’t take all the credit. The fabulous ladies, Mom comedians Jacki Kane (, Joanie Quinn (, Nikki Schulak ( of Honey I Shrunk My Libido and Nikki of Moms Who Drink and Swear had the crowd of women, eating out of their hand. I burned a vagillion calories that night laughing. See what I did there?

I hear there’s a MamaCon in Chicago come October. If I play my cards right, and save my lip gloss money, I might get to go!

See you then!



Want to go to MamaCon for 1/2 price? Bring a friend!

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First of all, you’re wondering what the heck is MamaCon.  Well it’s this, right here- MamaCon.
Sci Fi nerds, Comic book junkies and Star Trek geeks have their conventions- now moms do too! Yes, complete with spa treats, wine and free swag. They know what we like!
The weekend of May 18th in Bellevue, WA is MamaCon.
I realize that doesn’t include most of you since you’re not near Seattle. I understand.
But if you are reading this and near Seattle, then please consider this awesome FRIDAY ONLY deal.
And to put the cherry on the sundae, the icing on the cake, the butter on the bread- I’m going to be there hosting the evening’s comedy show- Honey I Shrunk My Libido. I can’t wait!! The show includes the fabulous Nikki Knepper of Moms Who Drink and Swear. I think we will be drinking, swearing, and laughing till our mascara runs!!
Tickets are available even if you’re not able to attend the day at MamaCon.
A message from Amy & Kim – MamaCon’s co-founders:
An amazing mom who attended last year’s MamaCon believes so strongly in what the event can do for moms like you that she wants to make it possible for more moms to come this year. Wahoo!
This awesome anonymous mom is making it possible for 25 other moms to attend for FREE. Be one of the first 25 to use the code BOGO24 when you register this Friday and you can bring a friend for FREE! (If you think MamaCon is fun on your own, just wait til you come with a friend.)
Here’s how to make it happen:
1) Find your buddy – post on Facebook or send an email telling your friends the first to get back to you can join you at MamaCon for FREE! (You can, of course, split the cost of one ticket making this a super duper affordable day of relaxing and refueling. Just a thought!)
2) Deal with your kids – enlist your baby daddy, significant sidekick, mom, neighbor, whoever to wrangle the kids for a day. Arrange an “extendo-playdate” and promise to return the favor – you’ll be so re-energized after MamaCon that you’ll be up for hosting multiple playdates!
3) Register for MamaCon this FRIDAY, May 10 starting at 5:00 AM for 24 hours only!
1) Register yourself. Use code BOGO24 and put your buddy’s name in the “How did you hear about us” section. 
2) Register your buddy. Use code BOGO24 and put your name in the “How did you hear about us” section. 
3) You must pay for each ticket via PayPal or credit card or it won’t work!
4) Your buddy’s name must be on your registration form or both tickets will be rejected.
There’s a limited amount and time so act fast! Mark your calendar and be ready to register at 5:00 AM on Friday.
Amy & Kim
PS If you join us at MamaCon and you have a horrible experience, we will give you your money back. Seriously.